Now and When

Every morning as you crawl out of bed, one eye focused on the past and the other staring at the future, you appear wall-eyed and you have bad breath.

The difficulty in turning your back on yesterday's blunders and tomorrow's successes is that you are free to do what ever it is you want. This doesn't sound difficult until you factor in the 'whatever you want' part. Feel like spending the day strolling up and down the street naked? Calling in 'just fine' to work? Eating left-over pizza with fried eggs on it? Do it! But you won't because of the constraints of the future. Your anticipation of probable results will keep your pants on in the supermarket. Your boss will fire you for the impromptu 'You Suck' dance you keep doing everytime he walks by. You won't pull the 'stop' cord on the bus every ten seconds because you'll have to walk downtown.

If you had one day to do as you wished, entirely free of responsibility, what kind of day would it be? Sit back and imagine it for a second. I'll wait for you.


Modern quantum physics tells us that, mathematically at least, there is no clear distinction between traveling backwards or forwards in space/time. Some postulate that the only reason we can't move backwards in time is because of the momentum of the Big Bang and that sooner or later we will. Others believe that we do. Ever zone out while you're on the Queensway and miss your exit because you were thinking about that time you grabbed Jenny Wasserman's ass and she thought it was Doug? Sounds like time travel to me. We all know that one person who just can't get over it. We say, "He's living in the past." The answer is ,"Wake up and smell the coffee." or "Get your head out of your ass." Someone's always calling you back.

I've got some things to do today and none of them are in this time. If you see me drive by and I don't notice you it's because I'm looking around 1927, or I'm checking in on my grandchildren, so shut it. The temptation to do a little wandering is hard to resist. The danger, of course, is that you'll end up in Medicine Hat if you decide you're not coming back. I for one try not to time travel when I drive. I tend to do it when I'm getting lectured for the 'You Suck' dance or when the clerk at the police station is asking me my name and trying to make me put my pants back on.

You should try it yourself. It's fun and relaxing. No kidding.