Mount Caucasus, Thursday Morning

"Excuse me."
"Go Away."
"Uh, Prometheus, excuse me. I have a question."
"Go away, for Christ's sake, I'm in pain here."
"Christ? Christ who?"
"Ugh. What do you want kid?"
"My name is Heracles. I'm on a quest and I was told you might be able to help me."
"Heracles. Fuck me, your Zeus' kid aren't' you?"
"Yeah, is that a problem?"
"Kid, who do you think put me here?"
"Yeah, I know the story. My dad got pissed 'cos you stole the divine fire from him and gave it to man and then you dodged that Pandora girl and thwarted his almighty revenge. Yada, yada, yada."
"And you want me to help you?"
"Hey, I didn't do it. Your the one who's prescient. You didn't know my dad would be pissed?"
"Yeah, I knew. Look at it this way kid; you wouldn't be here if it weren't for me. The way I see it, you owe me. Heracles, eh? I knew your great, great grandmother, Io. Pretty little thing."
"You knew her when she was a cow. You think she was a pretty little cow?"
"You're as bright as your old man. I have the gift of foresight kid. I know all about Egypt."
"If you have the gift of foresight, can you tell me how I'm gonna do with these Twelve Labours?"
"You'll do swimmingly. Now, get me down from here."
"What? Are you nuts? My dad will shit if I let you down."
"C'mon kid, you're gonna do it anyways. Remember? I have the gift of foresight so let's just skip the crap and get to the rescuing."
"O.K. smartass, tell me why I'm going to let you down."
"Because I'm gonna to tell you how to get to the Garden of Hesperides and I'm gonna tell you how to steal the apples, but first you're gonna shoot that damned bird before he comes back for another go at my liver."
"I see an opportunity here. There's an awful lot you could tell me. Let me think about this."
"You are so lucky I'm chained to this rock, kid. Don't think you can hide behind your old man, either."
"O.K. Tell me, was Pandora as beautiful as they say?"
"You've got me bent over a barrel and you want to know about something that happened thousands of years ago? You really are a dumbass, eh? Alright. Yeah, she was a fox. Oozed sex and had a body that wouldn't quit. Problem was she also carried around that damned vile your dad gave her and one look at that and I knew she was trouble. Unfortunately my brother, with his gift of hindsight, wasn't thinking with the right brain. What the hell good is hindsight, anyway? 'Oh look, now that it's happened I can see why it was a bad thing.' What a maroon."
"Yeah, right. O.K. back to the girl. How about her..."
"Oh shit."
"What?"
"It's that fucking eagle. Here he comes again. Get out that bow and arrow and do your thing, kid."
"You'll really tell me how to get to the Garden?"
"Yeah, kid, yeah. Just shoot that fucking bird."
"Y'know, you really have got a foul mouth. I'm not sure I need your help. Maybe I'll just go over there and watch the action for a little while."
"I'll tell you whatever you want, kid, just shoot the bird. Shoot the bird, for Christ's sake, shoot the bird. Wow, nice shot."
"O.K. back to Pandora. And then you'll have to tell me who this Christ guy is."
"Will be, kid, will be."